stress relief

Stress Management

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?"

Answers called out ranged from 8oz to 20 oz.

The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it."

"If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.

If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance."

"In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes
and that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on."

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden. "

"So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work/life down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow."

"Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you've rested. Life is short. Enjoy!"

And then he shared some ways of dealing with the burdens of life:

* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.

* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

* Never buy a car you can't push.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.

* The second mouse gets the cheese.

* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.

* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.

* A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.


NaiL IN THE FENCE

There once was a little boy who had a bad Temper.

His Father gave him a bag of nails

And told him that every time he lost his Temper,
he must hammer a nail into the back

of the fence. The first day the boy had

Driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next

Few weeks, as he learned to control his

Anger, the number of nails hammered daily

Gradually dwindled down. He discovered

It was easier to hold his temper than to

Drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't

Lose his temper at all. He told his father

About it and the father suggested that the

Boy now pull out one nail for each day that

He was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally

Able to tell his father that all the nails

Were gone. The father took his son by the

Hand and led him to the fence He said, 'You

Have done well, my son, but look at the

Holes in the fence. The fence will never be

The same. When you say things in anger,

They leave a scar just like this one. You

Can put a knife in a man and draw it out.

It won't matter how many times you say I'm

Sorry, the wound is still there.

' A verbal

Wound is as bad as a physical one.

Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They

Make you smile and encourage you to succeed.

They lend an ear, they share words of praise

And they always want to open their hearts to us.'

I am a people pleaser me

confrontation

I don't deal with things by confrontation unless there is no other way. It just isn't in my nature to be confrontational. If I don't like something I will generally find a way to let my feelings be known without confronting the person concerned. I am sure most people will agree that I am a nice person, I always do what I can to be nice to people I am by nature a people pleaser. I am constantly checking that my friends and family are ok that there is nothing wrong and if there is then I will try to make them happier whether that is by doing something practical or just by cheering them up a little. I like to put a smile on the face of others.

sometimes i see or hear something which i think is wrong. if i see something which could be hurtful to others or even the person doing it I have to say something. sometimes I will do this directly either in public or in private. Other times I make my feelings known to the ether and if that person takes notice then that can only be a good thing.

I think of my virtual relationship with other bloggers much like my kids. I love them but don't always agree with what they do but that doesn't stop me from loving or caring about them. I don't go for blog love ins. If I admire a certain blogger it is for the person I perceive them to be and what they write. I read a range of blogs some I share with others that I read, there are also others that no one else i know reads. On all these blogs if I read a post that I feel I can contribute to or have anything at all to say then I will whether my comment is positive or negative. there are also times when I read something that I just have nothing to say. I don't go for back slapping just for the sake of it.

I don't understand people who write blogs but only accept comments from people who agree with them. There have been times, not often but there have been comments which I have found hurtful or simply just don't agree with me. I would never consider deleting these comments or banning the author. Everyone has a right to their own point of view. Just as I have a right to say whatever I like on my own blog if others don't like it thats their problem.

Just as in my real life I can't please everyone all the time. sometimes I do or say something that doesn't go down well. I hate it when I have a row, even when I know I am right it still causes me stress and gives me headaches. My ex b/f currently feels that I have ruined his relationship with his latest g/f. I hate that he feels this way but I dont feel any guilt or blame. It is his fault that this has happened. He tried to wind me up pretendidng that he was single again and asked me to get back with him. Then the last time we spoke he said they had never split up, when I accused him of playing games and he was either lying then or now he didnt like it. denied that he had asked me to get back with him. his g/f now has doubts in her mind and its all my fault for saying this to him in front of her. how can it be my fault it was him who asked me to get back with him. If he wasn't still playing games he wouldnt have got caught out and they would still be ok. the only reason I still talk to him from time to time is that I have this ingrained belief that it is rude not to answer when spoken to. But I am learning that I don't have to answer to everyone all the time. I have now blocked him from seeing when I am online. If he ever reads this (I dont know if he still does) I hope you managed to put things right with your g/f but more than that I hope you learnt your lesson. It is and never has been a good idea to wind up other women you have been involved with either in front of your current g/f or behind her back. You should know by now that you will never get the better of me you just are not clever enough.

Dilemma update

I still don't know!

My head is telling me it's a big risk to a friendship that I value and have done for quite some time.

But as another online friend said to me on the subject of him meeting me although he had earlier decided not to but now does want to. He has two voices in his head the good one and the naughty one. he had listened to the good one now hes listening to the naughty one. that is kind of how I am feeling.

I have not discussed this with my friend since the original conversation although we have talked since. But throughout yesteday I found him popping into my mind. Last night when I driving to meet Oxo I was feeling as though this was perhaps not a good idea as I was not in the mood. Suddenly my friend who I shall refer to as Oliver popped into my mind (can't even remember what now) all I remember is that Oliver was in my mind and suddenly I was feeling horny. I met up with Oxo and we had a nice quiet drink in a pub thats a remnant of the 1970s before going down to the sea. Later while we were playing I suddenly found Oliver in my mind again! This time I was imagining something he had said during our conversation on saturday night. Something he wanted to do. I couldn't help it the image wouldn't go away and it was making me gush.

A big part of me is wanting to contact Oliver and say yes lets do it and the sooner the better. But the sensible part me says its a risk do I really want to take that risk.

Dilemma

I have an online friend .....well I have lots of online friends (mostly men)but this particular one, we chat lots on msn, text and by phone. (that narrows it down to a dozen or so) There has never been anything between us other than friendship, never any mention that this could or would be anything other than a platonic friendship. we talk about a variety of subjects, although mostly linked to our sexual relationships with others. We give each other advice. I am not saying that I have never thought about maybe this could be more. But as far as I was concerned it was a no go, we both have rules about who we will date and for both of us these rules, rule that this won't happen.

tonight we were chatting when out of the blue

so...I was thinking
fancy a fuck?

lol

I'm such a smooth operator

lol I'm suprised

you are so not!

I though I was 'safe'

listen, love, no woman is safe when I am around

to you not the other way around

we chatted about various scenarios but I have not answered the question

my dilemma is that although we are not local the distance is not great so it is a distinct possibility. We were going to meet anyway as he has some books he was going to lend me. If I agree to take this step will it spoil the friendship we have now. As a friend I care about him, would this become the first layer of an emotional involvement that neither of us would want. As friends could we just fuck without the friendship getting in the way. Could we just fuck without it later getting in the way of our friendship.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't tempted but would it be worth risking our friendship for. I know I am being negative which is unlike me and I should be considering that it could make our friendship stronger. At the moment I am about 50/50 I really dont know how to react.
maybe I shall see it more clearly in the morning. It is not often I am this indecisive about whether to accept a fuck .....its normally either yes or no.