March

I'm looking forward to the month of March much better than the last two months.
As I posted last night I am going to still see GB. He was busy this morning so we will talk later.
This morning I bit the bullet and emailed N that I m setting him free as I cannot give him the time and love he needs. I hadnt wanted to tell him in this way but I guess my new found confidence doesnt go as far as telling him to his face. but at least it was better than the curt text he used to send me each time.
Both HMU and GP were chatting online this morning. GP making sure that I still want to meet him but changing our date to next thursday as he now has an appointment with work on friday. He is very sure that he wants to get very intimate with me.
HMU sent me the following text after I told him briefly what GB's email said.
'thats good! I'm pleased.... Hope you still want to go to bed with me next week xx'
This is the kind man who was advising me how to deal with my situation with GB.

N has replied that he had thought a lot of me. Then later a second email ……I must think he is an animal in a field if I think he will forget me, I have made the wrong decision. He thinks he wasn’t enough for me. Not good enough for me. Part of me wants to tell him that I am really sorry. But there is no point in me contacting him. I know I shall get emails/text demanding that I return his computer books and disks that he lent me. I know him well enough to know how he behaves towards the woman he has split with.
Today I took my mum out for lunch, she has been stuck indoors for weeks since she had her knee replacement. We went to pub up on a hill with a great view in both directions. From the front it looks out over the city and out to sea, from the car park at the back you get a great view inland across the countryside. When we got inside we looked for a table by the window, most of the tables at the front were reserved. The first sign my eyes noticed was a long table reserved for (it was GB’s surname). At first I though maybe he had booked a table there for his business. But it was not likely as he probably didn’t even know the place it was in the wrong direction for him. But I kept an eye out just in case. It turned out to be a family group.
On friday I shall be having fun with SL and Mr & Mrs P. then on tues I should be meeting HMU then GP on thursday next week. so hopefully March will be a better month for me.