Then as an after thought I decided to take a new photo, it has been sometime since I indulged in this hobby. So as a special treat ...........
Monday, 8 December 2008
Monday, 1 December 2008
Tonight I bring you CF I wonder if any of you can work out what the initials CF stand for. Perhaps if anyone can give me the right answer I will post a new photo.
CF was the first man I began to chat with online after N went off with 'The Bitch' for the first time. We had chatted online a few times and were chatting on the Friday evening. I was feeling sexually frustrated as well as upset that N had gone off with The Bitch. I didn't know if he would come back to me or if I had lost him. (I was stupid and naive). I believed that he had only chosen The Bitch over me because I refused to have sex with him again unless I was the only one. (see I told you I was naive). CF suggested we meet up for a drink in half an hour, so at 10pm I arrived for the first time at the Gladstonian (which was to later become a favourite haunt of mine......I have even taken Romeo there .............I love the views in case you had not realised that).
We had a drink and chat, he was quite good looking, intelligent,polite, fairly well off having made his name in London designing some well know buildings. A local boy done good. He had returned to the area after several years away, was nearing the completion of his complete overhaul of the former council house which was now his weekend home. We were getting on well but the pub was closing and there was still more to chat about. I didn't need much persuasion to follow him in his BMW X5 back to his place. We sat opposite each other on leather sofas drinking wine as we continued to chat. He assured me that he had been out of the dating game for sometime and didn't really know what the etiquette of dating was these days. Suddenly he decided that he wanted to see my body. He wasn't trying to persuade me to have sex just wanted to see my body. I wasn't keen but eventually gave in to his insistence allowing myself to be led upstairs to his bedroom.
Once in his bedroom he undressed me laying me on his deep duvet when he began his exploration of my body. It wasn't long before he was pawing me. I liked him but wasn't sure of his motives. There had been no build up of passion, no cuddles and kisses. Add together his superior strength and confidence with my timidity and naivety and it was only a short time before we were having sex. With him I discovered that there are more positions than missionary and doggy style. He wanted me to stay all night with him. But I found sleep almost impossible. By about 3am I was desperate to go home. He reluctantly stood on his doorstep watching me leave.
Late afternoon I text him to ask if he had had a good day. He invited me over to share a bottle of red wine in front of his log fire. When I arrived he had been watching tv while he waited for my arrival. We sat side by side on his sofa watching tv discussing the programs that came and went. In all the time we were sat there he never once made a move to touch me until about 11pm when all of a sudden he said we should continue watching tv upstairs in bed. Again he led me upstairs, we undressed and climbed into his comfortable bed. But it wasn't tv he was interested in. No sooner were we under the covers than he made his move. Again I found sleep difficult to come by. I managed to make myself stay put until about 6am. I already knew by then that I wouldn't be returning again. I had been worried after my first visit but had decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. But after two nights where there was no exchange of affection I knew that no matter what N had done this man was not for me. He might be accomplished in sexual skill but the heat in the bedroom matched that of the frosty February weather outside.
So have you worked out why I call him CF?
Friday, 28 November 2008
Last night I was chatting online when I was sent a couple of text messages.
The sexual position formally known as 69 is now called 96. Due to inflation, the cost of eating out has gone up!!
What do you call a prostitute with her hand down her nickers...................self employed.
I forwarded these to Paulo and Mr Passionate. I didn't get a reply from either but that didn't suprise me. I hadn't been in contact with Mr Passionate for months not since the flurry of emails between us after I passed him outside Asda when he was with his wife. That must have been months ago because I was on my way to the gym.
I had been chatting online with Paulo not long before I sent him the joke and we had already said goodnight.
This evening as I was reading blogs my mobile took on a life of its own as a string of text messages flew back and forth between me and Mr Passionate. He gave me the sad news that he has moved away, now living in East Anglia. His wife is away for the next few months but he is behaving himself which he is finding hard. It isn't easy resisting temptation when your partner is away. He was having soak in the bath whilst texting me so he asked if I would like a peek. Under normal circumstances I would have said no but this was Mr Passionate and mmmmm his picture brought back such great memories of our times together. I had to reciprocate but only by sending him a picture that was taken especially for him on our last night together. It was a tease to whet his appetite when he was on his way to me that night.
his reply to the question ...................Remember this
I do indeed. Very well indeed. I also remember how good they felt around my neck, with you moaning below x
we talked about how we never took any pictures together although we had discussed it.
we never took any pics of us, a shocking waste! will have to rely on the memory ...... Those red heels resting on my shoulders as I slammed into you. You squirting all over my shaft as you came hard. Me filling that tight sexy ass over and over! Now I remember ;-) x
I believe I will always think of him as a friend, our contact will only be intermittent, I very much doubt we would ever get together again but we have our memories. Sex with Mr Passionate was always brilliant, he knew just how I liked to be fucked, but what made it even better was that we like each other as friends as well as sexual partners.
It did make me laugh when Mr Passionate was asking about my love life and commented about Romeo.............Please tell me he's not married lol. .................now that was a bit rich coming from my favourite married man (The man who fucked me the most in recent years).
Sunday, 23 November 2008
16 - 17 CS 9 months my first love
18-20 MS I still had feelings for CS but wasn't going to wait for him to realise he still wanted me (he would turn up on my doorstep unannounced until I made the mistake of telling him I was getting engaged to MS)
20 - 21 SS my first older man (22yrs older) he was in the Army and became very jealous and controlling, he raped me just after my 21st and again the day I tried to end our relationship
21 - 22 MS again but I had changed I wasn't the timid girl he had first known, I didn't really like him anymore. I found I could only tolerate being with him when we were in a group.
22 - 23 CJN love of my life,(14 yrs older) I was already in love with him by the time I got that stomach churning phone call from his 'wife'. He flitted between us for a few months. Before he fially left her and moved down to Kent to rent a bedsit with me. 2 weeks later he went off to 'find work' and didn't come back. This was when I became grief stricken and ended up n the verge of a mental breakdown.
23 At the back end of the year I found B (9 yrs older) he listened to my woes but he took advantage and lied. I soon had his g/f (he is father of her eldest child they were still sleeping together sometimes) on my case.
23 - 24 CJN returned I was in shock but accepted him back into my life. (he had returned to his suicidal wife) I became pregnant but when I miscarried that was the end of us.
24 paddy (my toy boy 3 yrs younger) I didn't know it at the time but he was my first fuck buddy. I taught him the joys of felatio.
24 - 42 SF (9 yrs older) he came along when I was vulnerable, we were both getting over broken hearts it suited us both to have someone to go home to. 6 months later I was pregnant. He is an alcoholic I should never have married him but I don't regret my boys.
43 -44 NAF first man in my life for 19 yrs. He flitted between me and 'the bitch' for 6 months before living with someone else for a few months we got back together for 2 months Jan 07
44 -45 This is where it gets complicated
lovers = SL, PL, Ade, my knight,Forest, Oxo,GB,Swinger
NSA = BT, KB,Scooby,CF,RR, GM,GI,Pat,Coach,
46 Romeo (10 yrs older) elusive all consuming love
I know I have forgotten some so will add as I remember them
Just making a few additions
Pilot, Imperial, Porche
Saturday, 8 November 2008
To be honest I find it a little bemusing, after all we have only met once in 9 months, but I was already in love with the man I was getting to know online before we met in person. Meeting him just confirmed how I felt. I am not so stupid as to have confessed my love to him. I did though as we were laying naked limbs entwined admit that I like him. He saw through that and with a little encouragement from him I admitted that I like him .............. a lot. He seemed to be satisfied with that. I wouldn't tell him that I am in love with him as that would scare the hell out of him, come to that it scares the hell out of me too.
When we met it was just perfect, I felt so relaxed so natural with him right from the first moment. I had joked in the early weeks that when we met I would feel as though I had come home. I don't know if I would describe our meeting as that but I did feel that I was where I belonged. During our hours together we talked about lots of things including the sexual things we have each done in the past and what we want to do. He told me some funny stories about his work. But now I realise that we didn't talk about his world and what he wants/expects from me.
I really regret that now, that other than, that seeing each other would be irratic, we didn't discuss in more detail what this relationship would be like. Each time he has been away during the 9 months since the start of us I have been sending him text messages and emails a couple of times a week. I do this because doing that make me feel closer to him plus he always when he returns says thanks for the messages. I send him a mixture some serious but with a joke thrown in for good measure, some funny tales and some just downright silly, then there are the soppy one and also the erotic ones, he will never know what he will get next.
If he is away for a week or two I might send him a text every other day even if it is just a row of xxxxxxx and perhaps 3 emails in a week but if hes away longer I would try to ration myself to only sending one or two a week. I don't want him to be overwhelmed when he returns. Now this is where I find myself regretting that we didn't lay down any rules earlier. He goes away and I am left here waiting not knowing when I will hear from him again. At first I am ok, then as the days pass I begin to get edgy, sometimes it is something someone has said, sometimes I manage to do it all by myself. I trust him implicitly, I love him, I have faith in him, in us. But my faith begins to waver as I begin to wonder is he really playing me for a fool. I don't believe he is, I believe he is so focussed on his work that he doesn't have time to think about anything else, but once those doubts start to creep in it takes all my strength to get my belief back but I do.
Then I regain my confidence and I am fine again and I carry on with my life as usual then I hear from him again. It is a cycle that I find myself following each time he goes away. But this time he told me he would be in th Far East for two weeks, I didn't follow the cycle I remained positive throughout, until the two weeks were up, I didn't hear from him right away but I was chatting to Forest and he started asking questions planting the seeds of doubt, I still didn't hear from Romeo I became more frantic. I began to do a little digging on the internet. I wanted to know more about what Romeo does, I found a website for another of his Companies. I pulled myself together I was fine again but after the 3rd week had gone and it was heading towards 4 weeks I was worried that he had become ill again or worse had been in a car/train/plane crash. I was worried that if anything were to happen to him I would never know. I agonise but eventually I gave in to my need to know that he is safe and well, I sent him an email through one of his businesses. Something I would never have done under normal circumstances, I know he likes to keep his business and private lives seperate. (yes I know I can hear you all saying .......proof hes married). But I don't agree.
Last weekend I did a little more digging and found out some information about his UK businesses, I also found the Company address he uses for his phone and credit cards. His female business partner lives at that address, now as you can imagine my mind went into a whirl of thoughts about whether they are/were just business partners or were they in a personal relationship. I was completely torn between believing that he is everything he says he is, and thinking that he is with this woman and I am his dirty secret. Yeah yeah I know most of you will be thinking the latter. But I think I was just going through another glitch, I pulled myself together again and became calm again. I can hear you asking why do I do this to myself all the signs point to him being married and I am just being a fool.
A few days ago I got a text from him, it was very different from any I had ever had before, basically he told me that he is very busy abroad I have behaved very badly and I must ONLY email his private address. I was very distressed by his text. I wanted to shout 'HOW DARE YOU' but I didn't. I took my time to consider my response. I wrote him an email saying the only thing I am guilty of is caring too much. That his prolonged silence had driven me to do something that I had agonised over, it wasn't something I had done lightly. I waited 24 hours before sending him my response. since then I have been feeling as though a kind of pressure has been relieved.
I have gone over his text a couple of times, he wasn't telling me he didn't want me. He wasn't telling me to stop contacting him, he was merely angry that I had used that business email to get through to him. I had forced him to mix personal with his business world. From now I shall stop worrying, I know beyond any doubt that he is a very honest man, he is not playing me for a fool, he is not stringing me along, he does still want me in his life, but I have to be content to wait until he is not working. So I am going to enjoy my life while he is not around, I have wasted enough time pining for him. I know that when he is ready he will return and I shall welcome him with open arms. All this has been is our first row if you can call it that. If anything I think this will bring us closer together. stop groaning I know you still think I am just letting myself in for more heartache. But if in the end I am wrong and I do end up with a broken heart then so be it. I love him and part of loving someone is running the risk that they will break your heart.
Monday, 3 November 2008
The first time you held my hand I knew your were mine
The first time we kissed I knew there would be more
The first time you held me I knew I was yours
The first time I push you down I knew you were mine
The first time we made love I knew there would be more
Although we are apart we are always together in my heart
My love is a blind love
I only have eyes for you my love
No other guy can take me away
My heart knows only you
Monday, 6 October 2008
Whenever we have chatted I reward him with one of my fantasies. Yesterday was no exception, this evening I returned home to find his response to my latest offering. He is always full of enthusiasm for my writing and today he did not let me down.
What a heavenly story and delicious memories stirred as I read you rude words. I'm desperate to have that glorious feeling of my hard wanting cock in your mouth, to feel your hungry tongue lick up and down my shaft. I want you to suck my balls for as long as your delicious mouth wants as you look up at me passed my throbbing twitching cock.............................. seeing your plump lips red with that racy decoration as you fill your mouth and slide lasciviously up and down my shaft .... I love you with all my heart and I could watch you all day and night greedily devour my manhood, tracing it's contours with the tip of your tongue and slipping the ridge of my helmet just past your lips...................... oh that glorious sensation..................... Kiss me now so I can taste the saliva my cock brings to your sweet mouth................ Kiss me hard I want to feel your passion ... suck my tongue deeply and me in turn sucking yours like a little cock of your................... I want to kiss your eyes, your cheeks, your nose your throat and much much more but later.
Take my cock again and let me see your pretty feminine fingers at play stroking it up and down and teasing my soft head.................. open your mouth again and sink me slowly sensually into your warm wetness ............................... God the sensation is divine, you're divine I adore you when you make me feel so good......................"You're making me cum LiR.............. as you release me in a cruel tease from your mouth a stream of cum flails through the air towards your pretty face....... too late to avoid as it slaps you squarely cross your lips and chin............. you cover me once again with you mouth to receive the next as it lashes to the back of your throat you swallow............... and salaciously suck me dry cupping my tightening balls with each spasm............ Arrrrrgh I'm in heaven .... I'm cum in your mouth and it feels so so good..............
Kiss me my angel, I want to taste my lust for you....... I want to share my manly passion for you ................. share the scent and lick your sticky face clean of me.............................. Oh I so want to relive your blissful vulgarity LiR, you're beautiful :-)
Do you have anyone special to share such emails with.
Sunday, 5 October 2008
If you’d bought £1,000 worth of shares in HBOS, this week your investment would have been worth £16.50.
If you’d plumped for £1,000 invested in XL Leisure, your shares would now be worth less than £5.
But if you bought £1,000 worth of Stella Artois one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminium re-cycling plant, you would get £214.
So clearly, the canniest investment advice is to drink heavily and re-cycle. Cheers – and if you can improve on this, let us know. Have a good weekend.
Wednesday, 1 October 2008
At least one of you will be wondering why I have not been showing online when I said I would be. The answer is that I am confused at the moment as well as being asleep by the time I expect to chat to you.
Romeo has been in contact even if that was just one brief text telling me he has just returned from his trip to fat east. Nothing more than that so I am not best pleased with him. I desperately want him, he is my world apart from my family. I expect hes sleeping off his jet lag. But even so.
So right now I am feeling really low about him. I could text him but I figure he would have had enough text and emails waiting for hi from me for the moment.
Then just to confuse the issue theres now Paulo clouding things up. Paulo is a man I have got to know through work. I have been talking to him since the start of the year. I have enjoyed our chats but recently he has started to keep me chatting more and more. Until the conversation a couple of weeks ago led to us swapping personal email addresses. We swapped a couple of brief emails then nothing for over a week until Monday. He phoned me at work as he would normally do. He kept me on the phone for ages which was ok it was quiet. He insisted on giving me his mobile number. So later I text him that his goods would be delivered today.
When I had just arrived home he phoned me for half an hour, later in the evening he began emailing me (5 in an hour) then the text messages began followed by the invite to chat on msn. We chatted until I went upstairs to bed. As my laptop was warming up (it takes a good 15 minutes)I started falling asleep and it still wasnt midnight. As I was dropping off there were two photos hitting my mobile, I didn't reply too either message I was far too sleepy. Then I was woken by his call this morning. He left a very nice voice mail message because as I was peering bleary eyed at my phone to see that it was a call not the alarm I missed his call. At work today he phoned me not once or twice but about a half dozen times, finding excuses just to hear my voice. Apparently he thinks I have a very sexy voice, and I intrigue him. He thinks I am fun and always cheerful. I do not know what he looks like and he doesnt know what I look like. I don't even know how old he is, I suspect younger than me.
I have been enjoying his attention and he has cheered me up no end from my sadness over Romeo. I just wish that the attention I was getting from him was what I was getting from Romeo. I feel totally confused. I cant get Romeo out of my head or my heart, then along comes this guy who has everything going for him he could probably have any woman he wants but its me hes interested in and that is very flattering. He cheers me up but at the same time makes the situation with Romeo harder to work out.
So if you have been waiting to chat to me then I am sorry I have not been in the right mind set but we will chat again soon.
Thursday, 25 September 2008
Saturday, 13 September 2008
If you have been reading me in the last 6 months you will be aware that I am so in love with my Romeo.
I know most of you are amazed after my history over the last couple of years especially since I began this blog, that I am determined to be faithful to Romeo.
I never said it would be easy.
Sometimes I find it so frustrating that he is away for such prolonged periods.
I am after all a red blooded sexual woman.
I have my sexual needs and they just are not being met.
This does not mean that I am giving up on Romeo.
Don't get me wrong, sexually Romeo is everything I could ask.
Just because I am in love with him it doesn't follow that he is the best lover I ever had.
I was prepared for him to be a good but not necesarily a fantastic lover.
He is amazing, the best sex I have ever ever had, and I have had some great sex
The problem is not the quality of the sex we share but the infrequency of it.
That is where I begin to struggle.
I can go weeks without being bothered
But then I get aroused (it can be anything that sparks that off)
Then I crave the male attention I had become accustomed to.
Shameless in my flirtation
It could be an exchange of emails, text messages or IM
The more the flirting goes on the more aroused I become which then leads to finding any way I can to find a release from my torment.
Scouring the more sexual blogs looking for stimulation
The throbbing in my pussy becomes more urgent
I need more attention more flirting
I begin to think about more than flirting
Can I do something about this
Can I seduce any of the men I flirt with into satisfying me in the way I need
I know I need to keep a rein on my needs
I know I can't give in to my carnal needs
If only I knew for sure when Romeo will be in my arms again.
My body aches for the touch of a man
The taste of a man who wants me
If he takes too long my determination might break down
Am I being unfaithful if I indulge in sexual exchanges by text, IM or email, if I don't actually meet the other person?
Am I being unfailthful if I meet another man for sex but we don't fuck?
Have you ever been unfaithful to your partner?
If so was it with just one person or a variety?
If you have never been unfaithful have you ever considered it?
would you be unfaithful if you were confident you would not get caught out?
What reasons do you have for being unfaithful?
Is it because sex at home is unsatisfactory or non exiestent?
Is it because you are a man and men are made that way?
Or is it because you met someone you just could not resist?
Friday, 12 September 2008
Oooooo, those rewards :-) No, don't stop............... More more.................................. all over mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that'ts it..................... mmmmmmmmmmmmm......................... OH!, now that's dirty, but don't stop!...................... Oh God, you're blissfully vulgar........................ Now that's naughty, speaking with your mouth full.................................. come and sit this way round, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ...................... What a perfect sight................... what a wonderful womanly scent........................... what a heavenly taste................................... But don't drown me, you know I can't swim so well.............................. mmmmmmmmmmmmmm warm and gushing and spent....... how I'd adore you in my arms right now kissing your mouth a satiated sex xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
So, It's out with the Vick rub then is it.
Let me know if you need any help. I'll put a tincy wincy bit on your nipples and pussy. That'll warm you up !!!!!
Your effect on me! God if only you knew :-) Bless you.
I'm serious about the vick rub.
Don't you think he has a wonderful imagination, it was that and his way with words that caught my attention almost 2 years ago and we are still in lust after all this time. He will always hold a special place in my heart.
Tuesday, 2 September 2008
Please don't tell him that he had got me aroused enough to break my abstinence from playing. can we keep that as our little secret please. Oh but you can tell him I did enjoy flirting with him.
Sunday, 31 August 2008
Back in the early part of the year I ordered 3 new vibrators and a tingle tip. I waited just a couple of days until the anticipated parcel arrived. earing it open I was keen to try out my new tingle tip. But what is this?.....................damn it the toothbrush the wrong make and doesn't fit. I need to get a new toothbrush (oral B) but couldn't spare the cash at the time. So for months my tingle tip has lain in its little cloth bag in my bedside cabinet unused.
If you read my main blog you will know that a couple of weeks ago I went visiting other bloggers and thought I would finally buy myself a new electric toothbrush. ( I have never used anything but a normal toothbrush for cleaning my teeth). I found one for just £14 or so I thought, at the checkout I discovered it was £30!!!! I have never spent more than £6 on a toothbrush. After my weekend away unwrapped my new 'expensive' toothbrush and discovered that it needed an adaptor before I could plug it in to be charged up. A few days later it has been charged up, scrabble in my bedside cabinet, find what I am looking for. ....................FFS it doesn't fit!!!! I have looked at all the electric toothbrushes on the shelf in asda it is the only oral B one. So what am I to now?????
having just found a tingle tip online to get the link to paste on here I found this
* fits most Braun Oral-B electric toothbrushes except 'Sonic' and 'CrossAction Power'.To use, simply remove your electric toothbrush head and replace with tingletip
of course mine is a 'sonic'.
Friday, 29 August 2008
The one who goes all over the world
Oh Romeo ...............oh yes very much
Hes still on the scene then
mmmmm yes he is
I didn't tell her that I am bessotted with him, that I have no intention of not being in contact with him.
I could say that he is the best looking man I have ever met.............he isn't
I could say he has the fittest body....................he doesn't
I could say he has the loveliest voice................he does
I could say he has a wonderful personality.........................he does
I could say he is the best lover.............................to me he is
I could say he is very considerate and kind .......................he is
To me he is everything a man should be except .................he isn't here
and just to make you jealous
I have had some great sex with the likes of Swinger and Mr Passionate etc but and it is a big but (no I don't mean mine)
The very very best orgasms I have ever ever had were the ones Romeo gave me. I am not sure what it was that he did but it was fucking wonderful.
Sunday, 17 August 2008
‘I told you not to be gorgeous’
‘Did you? I wasn’t sure, you said wear a skirt and tights don’t be gorgeous’
‘yeah I didn’t want you to be gorgeous.’
‘I know but I came how I wanted to ..............for me.’
‘I’m not sure what it was about you that made me feel horny first........ Julie you smell gorgeous but you look lovely’.
Before Julie could reply George leaned in and kissed her lips. They had agreed to meet for a drink only, but here they were in his hotel room kissing. Perhaps it was the vodka she had consumed on an empty stomach as they had sat in the bar earlier. Perhaps this was what she really wanted to do. This stirring in her groin was doing her no good at all. She should stop kissing him and go home, instead she holds George closer to her as she kisses him ardently.
George slides his hand up her leg revelling in the feel of nylon, as Julie begins to unbutton his shirt. He pauses in mid kiss to ask
‘tights? or stockings?
Mischievously, Julie giggles
It seems this was in effect the same as throwing down a gauntlet for George. As he ran his hand up inside her skirt she slips her leg over his lap giving him the green light to fan the fire burning in her. Much to her pleasure he wastes no time finding the already wet gusset of her tights. At last they are both giving in to the desires they have both been harbouring since that fateful day last year when they had met at a family party. Both there, with their respective partners. The mutual lust simmering since that day, now Julie is wriggling on the seat offering her throbbing pussy to him silently demanding his fingers on her.
His hungry kisses returned enthusiastically by Julie, he pulls her to her feet, the anticipation building as they help each other from their clothes. Soon Julie is left with only her tights covering her modesty. Moving onto the bed inviting her to join him, George tells her.
‘Let me lick you up and down, until you say stop. Let me play with your body baby, make you real hot, let me do all the things you want me to do’
Julie lays beside him
‘I want it, I want it, all of you baby’
Kneeling between Julie’s legs he reaches towards her pussy, drawing her knees up slightly she takes a deep breath in anticipation. Pressing his thumb against her, feeling the wetness countless times over the months. He looks at her questioningly and receives her nod of approval. He doesn’t waste time before he carries out his fantasy of ripping the thin barrier between them. Crouching lower he finds his reward first caressing her now naked clitoris with his finger then to her obvious delight flicking his tongue at her.
Julie clutches the sheet in her bunched fists as she feels that first orgasm building inside her and the dribble of wetness escaping over his tongue. It has been a while since she felt a tongue down there and she fully intended to enjoy this. It wasn’t long before George experienced the gushing of her orgasm as she moaned her way through the waves of sheer pleasure. She had let him hear her moans before when they were on the phone.
‘I loved it when I heard you the other day’
George move back up to kiss her again giving her the taste of herself
Kneeling beside her, he shoots his load across her chest, kissing once more before he grabs a handful of tissues to clean her up.
They dress before she bids him goodnight and heads back to her home.
Saturday, 9 August 2008
or perhaps this one which Lotto reminded me about earlier in the week
which I took whilst texting Mr passionate when I was at Mr Green's house on this occasion.
Any way you are probably wondering what this has got to do with the title of this post. Ok so now I shall tell you. By the time I got back to my own blog it occurred to me that a year ago I could have compiled my own set of cards featuring cocks. Yes thats right cocks. Since I became single again many guys have sent me pictures of thier cock. some on email or by IM but also quite a few on my phone. I did write a post about this last year. I have never asked for these pictures and to be quite honest I don't actually like looking at pictures of cocks, with perhaps the exception of the occasional picture of a cock that I have enjoyed in person, but then it is not the beauty of the picture that gets me but the memory of the pleasure I have had with the owner of that particular specimen.
When exchanging messages with Mr Passionate on the site where we met he has a picture of his cock. It always made me smile whenever I saw that picture not because I wanted to see that picture but because I adore Mr Passionate oh and also the passionate sex we always shared. At one point I had several photos of his cock on my phone and in my folders on pc but I don't think I spent a great deal of time looking at them. I also had a couple of videos he had sent me. again not something I spend hours drooling over.
So at one point I had a folder full of these pictures from a variety of men, many I had met but also a fair number that I never did get around to meeting. But I have got rid of these now remember my spring cleaning earlier in the year. Now I think I shall go and have a peek in the folders that are buried inside folders that buried inside other folders just to see if I might just have one picture left. Nope not a single one left oh apart from two of Mr Passionate but I'm not sharing.
Perhas you would like to vote for picture one or picture two in case I do decide to become one of Ro's 52 blogger HNT Cards (if he does decide to do it). Or perhaps you can think of anothe picture that you would like to see.
Wednesday, 30 July 2008
'poor delusional woman'.
I could have been upset by this but I wasn't because I knew that this person who hides behind that overused name had no idea how wrong they were. Ok I quite agree that on the face of it Romeo was stringing me along and I was a poor woman who had fallen for the sweet talk of a player. I don't expect anyone who is not privy to our conversations to understand why I was so adamant that Romeo is not a player but a very genuine man who for reasons most of us commoners would not be able to comprehend found it difficult to find time to be with me.
Anyone who has or knows someone who has their own business knows that it takes an awful lot of work and time to make that business successful. Many people who run their own business become work aholics. When that business has shifted due to customer demand to be based in another country it becomes hard to have leisure time at home especially when that work takes the business person from country to country at frighteningly regular intervals.
Had he been anyone else I would not have waited around for him for so long. He would have been kicked to the kerb months ago. But he has a gentleness about him, a genuine interest, he cares, he gives me confidence I didn't know I had. Any one who read this post about my fears may be wondering how I coped with my fears, how Romeo reacted to my figure. The truth is that from the moment I climbed into his car I forgot to worry about my figure. I didn't give it a second thought I was just so comfortable with Romeo, It felt so natural being with him. When we undressed each other I was enjoying the newness of it, of watching this gentle man carefully undoing each button on my blouse. I enjoyed watching his face as I released him first from his trousers then his briefs. We just enjoyed each other so much that there was no space in my mind to worry that I should hold in my stomach or position myself this way not let him see this part of me.
He adored playing with my nipples but took just as much pleasure from me pinching, flicking, sucking and nibbling on his nipples which if anything are more sensitive than mine. He has the most magic fingers and certainly knew how to make my juice flow and flow and flow. I think we found a new definition of 'waterbed'. I discovered over the last two years that I not only squirt but gush too. I always warn new lovers that a thick towel is an essential piece of equipment when having sex with me. With Romeo we didn't bother with towels it would have been a waste of time anyway as his fingers worked their magic both on and in my body. The only time I bothered to worry about my shape for a few fleeting seconds was when I caught sight of myself in the mirror as I checked the text I got from Bollinger Byrd.
Laying on that bed for all those hours as we played with each other was heaven, I don't just like sex I love it (N used to call me a nympho) but even so I have never experienced some of the highs I got from being with Romeo. He knows a few sexual tricks I had never heard of. I had felt for months as our conversations progressed that Romeo was on a similar sexual wavelength to me. Holding me close as he lay on his back we discussed sex at some length, what each of us has done (for me it was easy to tell him things I didn't think I would) I had never dreampt that I would tell him (not this early) that I had been involved in sex with more than one partner at one time. FFM and MMF, ok so I didn't tell him about the sixsome but hey I don't have to tell him everything at once. He told me about joining the 'mile high club' with a stewardess he had only just met. He told me about the world of light bondage that his ex had introduced him to. We talked about having sex with others but both agreed that as we have feelings for each other neither of us could contemplate sex with anyone else. Judging by what we shared on sunday and the things we talked about we have a lot of pleasure to lookforward to in the future.
Any doubts I could have had about whether the chemistry would be right when eventually we met, have been completely erradicated. I am so very happy and confident that I managed to wait for Romeo. Romeo as a lover is everything I could hope for.
Friday, 25 July 2008
'caught up in meetings'
his text had told her after lunch. She thought that would be all she would hear from him for hours, but that was ok as she was really starting to get stuck into the project she was working on. But his question about her sensitive nipples caught her off guard. suddenly she became aware of body parts that had not been on her mind until then. More text messages tormenting her as she shifted in her seat not quite concentrating on spreadsheets and figures to the same dergree as earlier. Not to be alone in her torment she demanded to know if he was sitting comfortably, guessing that as he tormented her he would himself be feeling aroused. she tells him he should come and get her, even as she types notes about customer accounts her whole body is alive with longing for this man who promises delights for her hard sensitive nipples. It is more than just her nipples that are alive right now. Later as she walks towards her door she hears the beep that indicates a missed text,
'how sensitive is my nipple? xx'
ah so now he thinks my nipple is his property she smiles secretly to herself. he tells her next, as she is in the garden hanging scraps of pink cotton and lace on the line to dry, that her melting will begin from her nipple.
Hands immersed in hot soapy water it is more than just her hands that are dripping as he tells her that she will melt when she can think of nothing else but him inside her. Does he not realise she has been imagining him inside her time and time again for months. Those tugging sensations emanating from her swollen clitoris as she thinks of him not just inside her but over and under her too.
Chores completed, dinner slowly cooking she sits down to catch up on her emails enjoying the silence that fills the house if only for a short time. Before the peace is shattered she selects some music to listen to as she gets back to work on her customer spreadsheets. Just as her music begins she is startled by his kisses vibrating on her ass to another rendition of his ringtone, just slightly ahead of the the one she had put on. He might not have anything to say to her but it is enough for her to know that he is thinking about her, although she knows now it is only her nipple he wants, still she feels that stirring in her knickers, but nolonger alone she can't do anything about this. Instead she enjoys the intense feelings this gives her, knowing that later she will use her middle finger to finish what he has started.
Tuesday, 22 July 2008
I am not sure how I would feel if I were to find myself in the same place as Forest but we are friends again so I guess that we are now 'friends who used to fuck'. From time to time we chat on IM just like we did before we met. One evening last week he was online before me. But before he signed out he said hello to me.
'hi, I couldn't sign out without saying hi'
Which I thought was very sweet of him. We chatted for a while which was good. In about 10 days time it will be a year since I last saw Forest although it was over a month later when we had our bust up. I will never forget that last time we were together.
Saturday, 12 July 2008
In the first few months I found it very hard when I didn't hear from Romeo for a week or so, as I had become used to receiving text messages emails and phone calls almost every day. Soon we were chatting nightly on msn, but there were times when these texts and chats were absent from my day. I struggled some of the time wondering where he was, telling myself not to worry because I knew that I would hear from him as soon as he was able. Then each time when I was beginning to despair, I would get a text apologising, he had just returned from wherever.
Each time he went away it got a little easier to believe that I would hear from him again. Each time he came back my belief in him grew. I am certain that in all these months his belief and trust in me has been total. As the weeks passed we were becoming closer and closer although we were both frustrated that we were not getting any nearer meeting. He never seemed to get the chance to be at home. whenever he was in the UK it seemed to be between flights.
Then at the end of April I didn't hear from him for a week at which time I got a text apologising but he was ill. It was another week before I got another text from him again apolgising and saying it was the first time his head had begun to clear. Another week later he finally text that he was starting to get better. Now during this time my belief in him did waver, after all if I was ill I would have wanted contact with the person I had feelings for, if for no other reason than to cheer me up a little. I found his lack of communication during this time hard to comprehend.
Once he recovered from his illness which had not only left him very week but also depressed, he was playing catch up with his work. He was soon jetting off to places as far apart as Malasia and Iceland. I requested that he tell me where he was going rather than where he had been. This he has been doing since then. But still his communication was limited in the most part to just one text at a time. I was not the least bit worried that he didn't have feelings towards me, but I was feeling neglected. This was not the kind of relationship I had envisaged having. I felt that I was giving everything but receiving little. I do understand how hard he works and how tired he gets but this was not enough for me.
I had to do something, I had to make a decision, I could not carry on indefinitely like this. I could say, this is it, end of the line, good bye. But I didn't, what I did do was to send him an email telling him how neglected I feel and that I am going to allow myself to accept dates with other men whilst I am waiting for him.
Much to my surprise since then I have heard from him at least once everyday even though he went to Thailand on Tuesday. He text me then phoned on Monday (the first phone call for what seems like months). During that phone call we both said a lot of things, but he made it very clear that he doesn't want to lose me. He isn't interested in even exchanging emails with any other woman, it is me he wants by his side. After this trip he doesn't have any more long trips in his diary at the moment. (I told him to hide his diary). He is hoping that we will finally manage to spend some time together in the next couple of weeks. Whilst he has been away he has emailed me every day and even text me whilst I was at the Festival on Friday.
So no my feelings for Romeo have not waned. I am as besotted with this man, who I have never met in person, as I was in the beginning, and I know he feels the same.
'A thought to cherish and know the reality will exceed all expectations and desires.'
So I am afraid you will still be reading about Romeo for a while longer.
Monday, 7 July 2008
Hi how are you? still having fun?
Do you remember me?
were you from *****?
yep but now *******
drink then drive to airport hotel carpark then home
yes dont need room at hotel now ..................if you fancy it
lol I gave all that up last year
thats a pity
I found someone who means a lot to me
good for you
if you change your mind
just feeling horny
lol isn't that normal for most men
yes .......anyway it was this year we met......................Cowes week
I decided it was time to settle down
you don't fancy a one off then
I had met this man once, we had a drink, then drove to a hotel, had a kiss in the car park then went our different ways. I didn't hear from him again until yesterday,thats 11 months!!!
how are you?
up all night shagging?
thats a yes then
not even in my dreams
shame I wasn't there
wouldn't have done you any good
I couldn't stay awake
this young man used to write a blog but gave up last year. since then we have been chatting on and off mostly at weekends. I have been giving him advice on his relationship with the girl of his dreams who he is very much in love with but has never had sex as she is not ready.Slowly but surely he is making progress. Every now and then he gets suggestive in his chat I find that a little off putting as he is 20 years younger than me.
06/07/2008 @ 23:36 the match wrote:
Hi I loved reading your profile you sound really interesting and fun. I would love to find out more about you! You're a beautiful woman and you look very sexy, I would love to hear from you again! xx
this was a message from a young man of 32 on one of the dating sites that 4 months ago I left this message on my profile.
not looking at the moment as I have found someone who makes my heart sing.
Now tell me he read my profile.
Thursday, 3 July 2008
Adam was hanging around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely.
So, God asked him, "What's wrong with you?"
Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.
God said that He was going to make Adam a companion
and that it would be a woman.
He said, "This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you,
and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you
She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you,
and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement.
She will praise you!
She will bear your children.
and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.
"She will NEVER have a headache and will freely give you love and
passion whenever you need it."
Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"
God replied, "An arm and a leg."
Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?"
Of course the rest is history............!!!!
Sunday, 29 June 2008
Last weekend we were chatting on IM then when I went to bed he phoned me, which was very mmmmmm. I has been ages since we last spoke on the phone. During the past week I have seen him sign into messenger but he hasn't even said hello.
Whilst I was out on Friday night I checked my phone and found that I had two new messages, my excitement that they were from Romeo was short lived when I discovered that both were from Steel. I am not sure if I ever mentioned him before. I can't remember exactly when but around about November last year I was feeling a bit blue probably following the episode with Skipper. I joined one of those text sites, one of the first guys to send me a message was Steel. We exchanged a number of text, I told him I wasn't looking for NSA he said he wasnt either. Over the next few weeks we were texting each other a few times each day, but I noticed if I didn't reply to his text fairly quickly he got impatient. Then as xmas was getting closer he made his suggestion that I should go up north to spend a weekend with him in a hotel then if we got on ok he would spend xmas with me and the boys.
Flaming cheek, I soon put him right, I had no intention of spending a weekend with him or having him stay for xmas. I made it clear that in my book we would have to see how we got on before deciding to go to a hotel. He agreed wholeheartedly but still continued in the same vein. By xmas I was ignoring most of his text messages which is something I find very hard to do. It goes against the grain for me to be so rude as to not reply. At the start of the year I was still getting messages every few weeks........Hi LiR remember me Steel I still think about you. I never once replied. By about the time I found Romeo the messages seemed to have stopped. That was until Friday night.................Hi LiR its steel do u remember me how are u xxxxx
needless to say I have not responded in any way shape or form.
Last night as I was chatting online with LV I got a message from Oxo, we had chatted briefly a week or so ago so I was surprised to hear from him again so soon. Espescially as the first thing he said was
we chatted for a while with him making suggestions that I should go over to his.
I miss those subtle lips of yours and theres room in my bed for two plus the dogs and four pups (his dog had puppies recently)
wanna come ova?
thanx for asking
so hows you?
fine ......out on the piss las night with work
lmao I wasn't looking
love life ok?
fending them all off except one
glad to hear it
not so lucky
oxo is offline
He always does that, asks how my love life is then signs out when I don't tell him I don't have one............well I'm not likely to tell him that am I. I can just imagine what it would be like if he knew the truth.
I have not heard from Romeo since 10.3pm last night :-(
Thursday, 26 June 2008
LV - MeMe Sunday 22nd
1. What was I doing ten years ago?
Enjoying Full Time job after 4 years unemployment, due at the time to my 3rd redundancy
2. What are five things on my list to do today?
Get up – eventually
Weekly shop – Morrisons
Watch French GP on TV
Apply weedkiller / feed to front and back lawn
A little bit of ironing
3. Snacks I enjoy?
Marmite Rice Cakes
4. Things I Would Do If I Were A Billionaire?
Oh I would enjoy life without ever asking the price
5. Three of my bad habits?
Don’t suffer fools gladly – I’m told it shows
Enjoy snacks too much !
6. Five places I have lived?
c) London N7 for a year at college. Hall of residence was 3 old houses in Carleton Rd – across the road the view was the high rear wall of Holloway prison. It changed a bit a few years later with major redevelopment . The wall is further back and they have built flats there. Google Earth it to check!
e) Assistant to Company Buyer
Wednesday, 25 June 2008
8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favourite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favourite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favourite Thing !
5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favourite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favourite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favouritething!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
Making A baby
This is hilarious! There is not one dirty word in it, and it is funny.
The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.' Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
'Good morning, Ma'am',
he said, 'I've come to...'
'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed,
'I've been expecting you.'
'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'
'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat'.
After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'
'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'
'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'
'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'
'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Smith.
'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'
'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures.
'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.
'Oh, my God!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.
'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'
'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith.
'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look'
'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.
'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'
'It's true, Ma'am, yes... Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'
'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'
Mrs. Smith fainted
Saturday, 21 June 2008
He had been saying that for several weeks. We had both been researching Swindon on the net looking for the best place for two people who have never met, to meet in a place neither of them knew. We both knew it would be weeks before we were both able to get away from our own families in order to meet. I was excited not just at meeting him, he seemed to be so sexy and intelligent when we spoke, but for me there was something else, something he didn't know, a deeper darker reason for wanting to meet him. But my excitement had grown when he had suddenly announced that he couldn't wait he needed to see me next week, we would meet on Saturday afternoon.
Now it is Tuesday morning and I am driving, feeling sleepy, trying to stay awake for the long drive up and down hill speeding south planning to stop at the 24 hour Tesco store where the A road I am on joins the motorway. I hadn't guessed when we spoke on saturday that he would become so impatient that we would have done this tonight. I had been on edge all day at work, praying that none of the family would ask me where I was going as I left the house at 6pm on this chilly early april evening. It had been growing dark by the time I arrived at Leigh Delamere services in Wiltshire a couple of hours later.
I must have been crazy, this was not a good idea, anything could have happened. I hadn't even seen a picture of him before we met. He had described himself but said that he was not very computer savy so hadn't managed to upload a photo although there was a picture of a car like his. (funny how so many men are not 'computer savy' enough to upload a photo).
I was a free agent, my marriage was over even if the paperwork was not yet complete and we were still living in the same house. I blamed him for my new love running off with 'The Bitch' . I needed this new man, I need him for my own selfish reasons. HE had gone off with The Bitch and I was hurting, how could he tell me he loved me then go off with HER. So I needed this new man to help me heal the hurt, but what better way to do this than meeting him in the place where The Bitch worked.
Arriving first I had wandered around going to the ladies then pottering around the shops and cafe. All the time wondering if The Bitch was working tonight and if she was would HE also be there somewhere as he waited for her to finish her shift. I didn't see either of them so returned to my car. As I walked over there he was parked next to my car. We had agreed that if I wasn't happy when we met then I could just drive away no hard feelings. I wasn't sure about getting in to his car so he got into mine. We chatted for a while then I drove across to the far end of the car park which was deserted. Parking under a street lamp that wasn't working (ha ha thats was funny it kept flickering into life for a few minutes at a time).
'wear a skirt and no knickers'
he had instructed me last night
'the thought of you driving to meet me with no knickers on will be very arousing'
We chatted some more then we began kissing, slipping my shoes off, I climbed across into the passenger seat planting myself in his lap. His hand inside my skirt, touching my already aroused and wet pussy. My hands pulling at his soft black roll neck sweater, tugging it over his head exposing his smooth chest. Soon we are both devoid of clothing as we explore each other with our hands and mouths. It feels good to have this slim toned body under my touch. He is very handsome this man who has me in his grasp. His arousal very obvious as is mine. Half worried half excited that someone might guess what was going on in this car with the windows steamed up under the spotlight that is the flickering street lamp. Like a beacon showing everyone where we were. He shows not a flicker of concern as I crouch in the well of the car with my lips and hands caressing and pulling on his erection. I hadn't yet learned how to hone my cock sucking skills but even so I still knew I was good at it even in these early days. Instinct and long ago memories of converting a previous lover who had been unaware of the joys of receiving fellatio, hold me in good stead.
It was approaching midnight on this frosty night before we broke apart, saying our goodnights with promises to meet again soon. Perhaps I wouldn't be needing HIM in my life afterall, let The Bitch keep him. So here I am at 1am, a smile on my face, struggling to stay awake as I head towards HIS home town. Feeling that this 200 mile round trip for a fuck in my car was well worth the effort.
Monday, 16 June 2008
He felt the hot water run over his body as he massaged the soapy lather into his tanned skin. People always remarked on how brown his skin was given his industrial Caucasian roots. He noticed that he was still aroused and looked down at his......................
Both he and she had wrestled with the moral issues and both had gave way to their respective thoughts in favour of a meeting.
She changed, as instructed, into a new pair of black 10 denier tights....................
He led her by the hand and turned her so he was standing behind her and began to kiss her neck and.......................
He sat on the bed and pulled her playfully across his knee and began to slap her arse - she seemed to enjoy it............
She slid on her black seamed stockings and then sat astride him gently............
He sat proud on the bed as she duly obliged and rolled the gossamer sheath over his erection
Lotto was online chatting to me briefly this evening
he told me
i'm working hard to turn you on LiR
i want you LiR
i want my correspondence to turn you on, make you feel the need to play with yourself and think about my story as you do
with flattery like this do you see now why I find him hard to give up?
Sunday, 15 June 2008
Each lover was different, each gave me different things none was either more special or less so than the others. I didn't ask about their wife/partner but if they wanted to tell me I listened. What we had was in the moment. I gave them my full attention and they gave me theirs whilst we were together. they all knew there were others and sometimes they liked to hear about them, they found it a turn on to hear about my other encounters. Some liked to give me advice about how to handle various situations with one or other of my men.
Now I don't see any of them (my choice) although I have not told one of them that we are over. The situation where we are both available has not arisen so it isn't an issue, I have only made sporadic contact with him, we both have busy lives and I am sure he has found others to fill the spaces I have left, even though I have no doubts that he would make space for me again. We both know we were good together.
I have moved on from that time when I craved sexual atention more than a one to one relationship. I am going through a self induced drought. I gave up my encounters with Oxo last autumn (he has now finally given up asking me to visit him). So apart from one weekend with Harvey last November and ne afternoon when I was juped by Coach back in January I have been celibate since early September.
Since last November/December Lotto has been trying to persuade me that he really really wants me. From when we first got in contact early last year, meeting for a drink in March of that year until December 2007 I was under the impression that he was single. He had always maintained that he fancied me and wanted to do naughty things with me, but he didn't want a relationship. As I was at that time coming around to wanting a relationship I kept him on the back burner simm ering away but never coming to the boil as it were. During the last 6 months though he has been turning up the heat. we both know now that he has a g/f who apparently isn't interested in sex. I don't quite know where she fits in the picture as I know he lives alone, he doesn't seem to be with her in the evenings or weekends apart from a few weeks ago when he was texting me while she was upstairs. I have a man in my heart who I don't want to betray.
My current dilema is having two men who both turn me on, one is available but doesn't want a relationship the other does want a relationship but is never in the country. So all the time that Lotto is on the scene there is always the promise of the opportunity to end this drought with a very sexy man who keeps telling me how much he wants me. But however much he wants me I know he would just be using me to get the sexual gratification he doesn't get in his relationship.
If I was to give in to his pleas to satisfy my own sexual appetite I would be using him because even when he is turning me on with his pleas, he is not the one I trully want to be with.
Romeo on the other hand does want me as the complete woman which of course includes the sexual being that he adores. He wants the long term relationship, but isn't here, he knows there are other men in my life but he trusts me completely just as I trust him.
If I give in to the lust that Lotto brings out in me .........'god I feel so fucking horny I want to fuck you now baby' ...... just one of the text I sent him last night during our 3 hour lust up. I would be using him which I don't want to do. I would be betraying Romeo which I really don't want to do. Lotto says that isnt so as I have not yet met Romeo. Maybe we have not met but I still feel committed to him.
I could easily meet up with Lotto for a night of passion (he has just begun to chat on IM and has instantly got me aroused) and Romeo need never know, easy. But I would know. I have been thinking about this business of using. I really should stop chatting to Lotto if I don't want to have sex with him, all the time I am chatting but not going through with meeting him I am leading him on. But I can't give him up, he gives me the constant reminder that someone who has met me still finds me desirable. I don't like the idea that I am using him, but would that be so bad, he is after all just using me to get the sexual gratification he isn't getting from anywhere else. But he could get it elsewhere, he has offers from other women but it is me he wants. I tell myself to give him up, he isn't Romeo the man I really want. He doesn't really want me just sex with me. I should give him up I deserve better than one night of sex with a man who doesn't really want me. A man who gets me aroused but isn't the man I want. These two men have me all of a dither yet I have never had sex with either of them. It was so much easier when I was a lover of several, not the one and only for any.
Because I have told Lotto that words excite me more than pictures he is busy right now writing me a story......apparently he is already getting himself aroused as he is writing it.
Saturday, 7 June 2008
last night out of the blue I received an email containing 8 photos. Last summer I really wanted these pictures to illustrate my special friday. Now though I have moved on from the place on my journey that I had reached last summer. I had promised to share these photos so although looking at them now does little for me I have posted a few of them for you if you can be bothered to find them. I am not proud of what I did but at the time it was something I needed to do. I don't regret it just don't feel that it has any significance to the person I am now.
ps if you shock easily don't look for these pictures
Sunday, 1 June 2008
I wander what this person thought when they googled 'hypersex impaling' and landed on this post . It is interesting sometimes to read back over a post I wrote over a year ago, seeing how much I have changed in my thinking in that time but also reading back the comments from that post Interestingly only Vi still comments......mmmm now I wonder did I ever give her the answer to her question. was it true or was it fantasy?
next I checked out 'how to deal with mother-in-law communicating with ex girlfriend of your husband' some people are very precise about what they are looking for. I found myself reading these posts here and here.
'married callgirl' came up with my recent posts I don't think 'call girl' was mentioned once in this post
I read all these post when I followed the link that 'insert finger cervix porn' landed on. probably not what this person was looking for
I seriously wonder what the person who googled 'stockings squirty cream slut' thought when they landed here
So having explored the recent google activity on here I then went to what is now LiR writes and did the same thing.
it seems that there has been a fair bit of interest in 'lady joins the harem'. since then Ron has closed his blog and reopened it so the link to his harem stories has gone. But I did I believe save the Lady in Red story on word I just have to remember which computer then I can post it here again. But if you want to check out Ronjazz's more recent blog then go here.
there seems to be a lot of activity asking for spanking which all seem to lead the reader to either Bring it on or what I learnt.
'Beer garden hot pussy' landed here a good choice or not I wonder.
Now lets see what google activity there has been on LiR
Oh dear who ever was looking for 'how to get mestrip in pokemon diamond' was not wanting to know about my drunken night out this weekend lmao
How funny to find myself reading this having followed the request for 'happy birthday picture naked lady'
Hmm I wonder what else I would find if I followed the same requests on google.
Monday, 26 May 2008
The conversation went something like this.....I will probably not be totally accurate as this happened some 24 years ago.
Speaking.... who is this?
Sandy...............I am C's wife (to me she sounded like an old lady)
What do you mean your his wife (I thought this was someone playing tricks on me) he isn't married anymore.
Yes he is he's married to me.
How did you find this number, no one knows I am here except my family
There was a piece of paper in C's case with your phone numbers at home and work with a list of days and times (that was the days I was free so he could phone me, I worked part time as a barmaid in the evenings.) I phoned your home and your brother said you were at your grandparents. I told him it was about C so he gave me the number. (my brother later said that she had been crying and as she sounded older he thought it was C's mother and something had happened to him).
I don't remember how the rest of the conversation went, I was in shock. I was beside myself with all kinds of emotions, the next 2 days until I could speak to C seemed to last forever. The previous time I had seen him he had said that he wanted me to have his child. In my naivety I thought that was his way of saying that he wanted to marry me. this made the phone call from Sandy even more of a shock. Now I am older and wiser I realise that what he really wanted was not another wife but another child. His first wife had taken his daughter away and he never saw her. His second wife, Sandy had two daughters who were now grown up with babies of their own. What C wanted was to be a daddy. At the time I was too blind to see this. I was in love with him and that was all that mattered. This new revelation that he was still married was a shock but I soon came to the conclusion that I loved him too much to give him up.
He convinced me that he didn't love Sandy, that he had rescued her from an abusive husband, taken her and her girls in. She had wanted to get married so he married her because he felt sorry for her. He told me about all the times she tried to harm herself, either cutting her wrists or taking overdoses. Each time they had a row she would do something to get herself put in hospital, he would get a call from the hospital so he would have to go and play the doting husband, he hated it.
Not long after the call, they had another row and he turned up on my doorstep some 80+ miles from his home. He couldn't stay at my parents home so we found a B & B for the night. The next day he got the call to say she was in hospital so off he went again........this went on for a few months. He would leave her, come to me she would injure herself he would go back to her I would hear nothing until the next time. I don't know how I got through these months, even when I wasn't seeing him because he was back with her I was still getting the hate calls from her and her elder daughter Liz. Some of them at 2am, it was affecting my whole family. At least at work all calls came through the switchboard and I was friends with the receptionist, so she screened my calls as much as she could. In January 1985 he came to me this time it was all over he was never going back. we found a bedsit to rent for 3 months and moved in there a few days later. It was 5 minutes walk from my work. It was the first time I had lived away from home, although I had been collecting bits and pieces for years so I had pretty much everything we needed. We had a small kitchenette in our room but had to share the bathroom across the hall. To me it was heaven to be living with the man I loved, our little love nest. It was ok for me as I was working all day but C was bored. So he went off to find work. he didn't return for 11 months. 11 months that saw me on the verge of a breakdown because I kept everything inside, I refused to get upset until I heard from him.
When eventally he did come back he told me that he had had a call from the hospital, he went to visit, but she persuaded him to stay, He hadn't been able to bring himself to tell me he had gone back to Sandy. It took until August 1986 for that episode in my life to be over.
Those two years had taught me that if you love someone you get hurt, so I opted out, I didn't ever want to get hurt so badly again. It was only after I had my Cancer that I realised I had spent twenty years just letting life pass me by. Now I intend to live my life and that includes the risk of getting hurt